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What Is Female Domination?

Female Domination and the Professional Mistress, seem to be things that many people misunderstand. When I tell people that I am a Mistress, I see their reaction span a wide spectrum of emotions from excited interest on one end, to disdain and revulsion and even fervently damning me to hell for being so immoral, on the other end. What's more, is that so many of the people contacting me who should have some insight, often have an equal ignorance of who I am and what I do as those vanilla people. What follows are a few words of what Female Domination is and the role of a Mistress.

First of all, it's my belief that most FemDoms don't hate men. In fact, we enjoy them and play with them like they are beloved toys. Let's face it, without men, what would a Mistress have to dominate? All of the rhetoric about how men are lesser beings than us is really just part of the game. There are differences between men and women, but really each gender has it's own special qualities.

Yes, we like you guys and we need you guys, but don't get a fat head. You need us more than we need you because there are more submissive men around than dominant women, so keep yourself humble and stay in your place. It's a simple matter of economics. More demand than supply. It sure is nice to be on the supply side of this one, isn't it girls?

Now, what a Mistress likes is a man that wants to be submissive

to a woman and serve her with a humble abandonment. Yes, that means you, the humble male slave, asking only to submit to the bidding of the woman he worships.

Got it now? You submit to me. Novel idea huh? And that means what? You talk to me and tell me what you are capable of doing for me. If I am interested and feel like it, maybe, and I stress maybe, I'll allow you to visit me and have you entertain me. Keep in mind, I don't need you, I have daily offers for everything I need. Remember, there is more demand than supply.

So, true female dominants are not out there searching for men to take care of them, and those that have half an ounce of substance to them, don't need to accept every offer to play that comes around. We don't need to act the part of cute little sex kittens that run around shaking our hips trying to get a bulge to form in the crotch of your pants. We don't care if you bulge or not. That's your problem. We don't care how well hung you are, nor how well you can use your tongue. We also don't get very impressed with how much money you make, nor if you have an important, powerful job. What is important to us, is whether or not you can get your focus outside of yourself enough to pay attention to us with dedication and humility. Again, it's simple. Pay attention to us with dedication and humility. That's high mileage stuff!

So, I am sure there are those men that may be thinking that they are not like what I describe above at all. They really want to be submissive to a woman and do her bidding. I have met men like that. They understand what Female Domination is and how to act. If that is you, then you are welcome to knock on my door anytime.

Here's the problem. So many people don't understand what Female Domination is all about. For some, they think that if they go to a professional Domme, they are going to have an hour or two of rough sex. Others think that they will get a spanking or a whipping and then have sex or get a blow job or a hand job. Hey, there are prostitutes out there that do that, but, I don't know of any Professional Female Dominants, that are also true lifestyle Dommes, offering those services. If you are looking for kinky sex, go to a prostitute. If you're married, talk to your wife or if single, get a girlfriend. Actually, female Domination with a woman you love, and can have sex with, is the best of two worlds. You have an intimate sexual partner who can also be your Mistress! And the Lord of economics said, "Supply met demand and it was good."

If you do not have a partner that your can share your interest in Female Domination with, and you are NOT wishing to have sexual relations, then a professional Mistress may be a good choice. Let the Mistress be in control and don't expect sex or harbor resentment because she won't let you satisfy yourself. Follow this simple rule, and you will do just fine.

You see, Female Domination is about a male needing and wanting to be submissive to what is feminine. It's about being who you are, a man, and knowing that you are not complete, unless you can experience the essence of a woman. It's not about getting your rocks off!

Historically, men have always been intoxicated by the mystery of why they desire women so much. As much control as they may have over things outside of themselves, they struggle helplessly to unite with that which is feminine. The Italian word for love is 'Amore', which comes from the Latin 'A', meaning next to and Mor, meaning death. So, really, this means being in love is like dying. Or, in other words, you lose yourself completely. To fall deeply in love with a woman is to be devoured by her and lose yourself, or your life as you know it, to your passion.

Pretty strong stuff, huh? But that is what is at the core of Female Domination. It is not about making love, but rather about being devoured by the passion for a woman. To be overcome by what is so strong and powerful, that you will suffer anything, just to be in her presence. To be a submissive male is to be consumed by the flames of your passion for the unattainable, idealic strength and power of your Mistress. This really all takes place between the ears, not between the legs and is much more satisfying. However, it does take a good highly skilled, intuitive Mistress to bring you to this heaven. When you get there, you really don't care what is going on between your legs, yes, believe it ! Orgasmic goal orientation belongs somewhere else, like, with a professional escort perhaps.

I have known many ProDoms in my life, and have noticed that the successful Female Dominants seldom have the perfect Victoria's Secret body. They are more likely to be women that are mature, have strong frames, and voluptuous curves. Some of them are just plain fat and yet they have survived for years in the business and continue to thrive. Why? Isn't that kind of world turned upside down? It is not what one would expect by drawing conclusions from all of the mass media propaganda that we are bombarded with. Sexy women are all slim and petite, aren't they?

Most of the young skinny women that I know may have great personalities and are probably a good roll in the hay. It's been my experience, that although they are great people and cute as a button, they don't command the experience and wisdom of a woman who is confident with being herself and with her sexuality. What makes a FemDom erotic and sexy is not a skinny body or your daughter's best friend's youthful perkiness. It's the power and control she possesses and her ability to project it. Power and control are what is sexy and what the submissive male wants and needs. I'm not saying that it's alright to be fat and frumpy. Believe me, I work hard at keeping fit. What is important, is not so much the state of your body as it is the state of your mind. This is why the successful Femdom that has staying power remains on top. She has gained the wisdom of experience she needs, and has learned what it really is to be an empowered woman. She has learned that possessing power and control does not happen by lying on her back and spreading her legs. Standing on her feet and keeping her panties on works better!

Why must the female Dominant be unattainable? It's simple. When two people make love, they become so intimate that they become one. They are not separate as they were before. They do not see one another from the outside, but rather as the union of two together. What's wrong with this? Nothing, if it is your goal to become closer and disguise the boundaries between the sexes. That is not always what one wants to or needs to do. If it is your goal to experience yourself fully as a male then you cannot unite with a woman and become one with her. You need to be male and experience a woman separate from her. You need to feel the want and admire the beauty of her femininity apart from her.

Here is an example of what I am talking about. Are you able to see your own eye? Of course not! The only way to see your eye is to look in the mirror, but what you see is not your eye but a reflection of your eye. To see a woman, you must be separate from her. You must experience her power separate from you. If you become one with her, you can only see her as a part of you. Once a man and a woman have sex, everything between them changes. If they are in love and are seeking the intimate bonding of lovers, sex is great, but if one is a Mistress and the other her submissive, the difference between you becomes diminished. The perspective of the submissive changes. He has experienced that which he longs for and he no longer needs to be subject to her. The erotic tension that drove his submissive motivation relaxes and all the sense of urgency he once had disappears. The Goddess that once stood before him demanding obedience, now becomes just another mere human like himself. The Female is no longer dominant because she has allowed her power to flow from her.

In the movie, The Wizard of Oz, the great OZ performed wonders because those that knew him as the great OZ held the mystery of his power in high esteem. He was different from them and he commanded great respect because those that worshiped him needed the power of great wisdom. As long as they could experience him as something separate from themselves, they believed in magic and felt all the glorious wonderment of it's potential. When the curtain was pulled back and the man OZ was revealed, the mystery, and hence, the glory and power were gone. Nothing else changed, his wisdom was still real, he could still spell out to those that needed it, the words that would help them go to wherever they needed to go, but The Great Oz died.

Female Domination is the same kind of mystery. It must be kept separate from those that worship it in order for it's mystery to live. If the mystery is lost, so is the power, so is the potential, so is the beauty and the excitement that drives all that long for the adventure to believe in something greater than ourselves.

Female Domination is not having sex with a beautiful, strong and powerful woman. It's a man wanting sex with her and allowing himself to suffer his passion for it.

~ Lady English

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